I am a Believer Now

Black Holes and Baby Universes. It was the first Stephen Hawking's book that i studied ( A gift from a very respectable teacher ). Over the time, while I developed more and more interest for theoretical Physics, I read couple of other Stephen Hawking Books  too:  A Brief History of Time and Universe in a Nutshell.
The Physics and theories I learned from all these books is not a subject of discussion today. Today I am going to talk about how a renowned scientist has got guts to prove himself wrong. He proposes a theory in his PhD Thesis, negates it later, says again "I was wrong" and moves on to next and so on.
I have read, repeatedly in his books, the sentences such as, "But I was wrong", "My calculations were incorrect" etc etc. Man, thats Awesome!
Well, today I want to make a confession. I used to believe that Human Beings have full control over themselves. That if, for example, an addict wanted to quit, he could quit. It was all about the willpower. I used to have a strong belief in this theory. Well, People! Let me say that "I was wrong". Let me say that, "My calculations about life, were completely incorrect". The equations missed some very important constants and parameters. In short, they were incomplete. And now, I am a believer. I believe that willpower isn't good enough. I believe that human beings can be weak too. I understand the dilemma of that addict. I understand the life just a little bit more.
I am a Believer Now!



A new Start....

So my new job (or should I call it a job yet?) gives me the opportunity to become a researcher. And not just any researcher, The-girl-with-the-dragon-tattoo-type researcher! God I wish I was friends with Lisbeth Salander or someone like her was sitting here with me (I mean you Mr. Gray!).  I am just not research type material. Who did what in which year? How could I know! After hours and hours of internet searching I was able to write just one page! And my boss now thinks that I am some technical proposal writing machine that was born for this very act. So he assigns me couple of other documents to write! The world is cruel, isn’t it? I can write novel you know; or a letter story or short story, drama, song, anything! I just don’t like literature (technical or not) and don’t like non-fiction.

People! Lemme tell you it’s all not that bad. I mean, I do feel like a researcher now. Yesterday I had to visit this hospital to collect raw data. How that trip was completely useless is another story. You should also see the irony in my life. I never wanted to be a doctor, I hated medical terms. And my first task in engineering career is biomedical research! So now I kindda know what CAD is? Or… or…. Oh this is it! This is all I have got till now! Frustrated……. L

As this is the stage where I have said good bye to my student life and entered this so called practical life, I must share how I feel about that. I hate it. I miss my college friends (Mr. Gray, Pashu and many others). I miss my high school friends (ROM, salu and many others). I miss my teachers, I miss studying, taking exams, old-fashioned building of my college. I miss Shah jee’s shop, the stationary shop; in fact I miss everything! Truth is I don’t like being a grown-up. I wanna stay in my age like a vampire.. Life has gone slow, steady and boring. I wish things can change a little bit around me as I don’t wanna change…..


The One With Ziarat Incident

yun di hme azaadi ke dunya hoi heraan 
Ai quaid e Azam tera ehsaan he ehsaan
And now you have paid him back! He gave you a home, a free country where no one stops you from going into your mosques, temples or churches. And this is how you repay him?
I believe this is the saddest incident of all bad things that ever happened to Pakistan.
As I kid, I always looked Quaid-e-Azam Muhammad Ali Jinnah as my hero. I wanted to be like him. I loved his rules, his disciplined life. And I hated all those who said anything wrong about him. I still remember how it pinched me in my heart when one of my friends used to say "qaid aisa tha wesa tha" Couldn't she say "Aise they wese they" ? I hated all those who refused to give him the respect he deserved.
I hated those people, Imagine how much I loath those who destroyed his residency? What kind of nation does that to their national heroes? What kind of nation we are?
As a kid, whenever I looked on his picture, I felt that he was unhappy. I could see tears in his eyes.. His eyes had many questions in it. What are you doing to this country? 3 blasts a day! Why are you destroying my country?
Well, now there are actual tears in his eyes.... see for yourself..
                                           

  

The One With The New Budget

O.k I will just cut to the chase. So you have enough money for distributing stupid laptops and metro buses, and you don't have enough money to pay the government officers !!!!
"Tankhwa daine ke paise nai hn barhain kahan se"
arey wah ji wah! ab log mehnat mazdoori krn aur ap unhe tankhwah de b nai skte!!!! 
Height of Hypocrisy! I can't believe people voted for you guys!
"Punjab me tankhwahon me 10% izaafa
  Khebar Phakhtoon Khan me 15% izaafa"
arey Khuda ke liay mughe koi ye btai ke wafaak kis khatey me ata he!!!! 
Prices of everything were increased in this budget. How do they expect us to buy those things with no increment in our wages?
pata nai is mulk ka kia bne ga. Awaam ke pas daal kharedne ke paise nai aur ye laptop bant re hn! 
If you really want to spend money on education, give us scholarships yar! Especially to those who can't afford their studies. Create jobs, establish universities and for God's sake do something about the sarkari schools!!
udhar bachey chataion pe beth ke parhtey hn, khasta tareen amarton me beth ke 'pai se Pakistan' prhtey hn. Us gandey aur chotey se sehan me kharey ho ke qaumi tarana aur Lab pe ati he dua roz subha sawerey parhtey hn. Unka kia? kbhi aap logo ne udhar kuch kharch krne ka socha?
I am simply sick of these double standards! There are lot more problems residing in our country. That is a topic of another blog post. But someone just tell me, why this injustice? Why? Will Pakistan be like ever be a normal country? ever??? I wonder when.....

The One Where Abbasi Doesn't Join Us

So, the last paper of my engineering degree sucked. In fact all the life was sucked out of us when our common nightmare was to get marks in negative! But you know what? Life always finds its way. And on that fine day, it found a way in form of colors.....
                                                          Flash Back
 It was an official rang day of our degree. Colors here, colors there, the whole Mechatronics departments was looking like a huge 3D canvas with a lot of red color in it. As usual the electrical people were shoved off by authorities and were told to go and have their fun else where  :/ (aur phr log kehtey hn electrical sari hoi he... hun! ) Anyways, we had our separate piece of fun right in front of the department and nobody stopped us! In fact there was no one around to shove us off :p And yet Abbasi didn't join us :( I tried to convince here, Pashu tried, the whole other bunch of people tried but the Abbasi had her rules that she couldn't break, or modify..
Actually she reminded me of myself a few years back. I never appreciated that sort of fun. (Me going crazy, throwing colored water on others, taking wild pictures etc etc) May be it was in my mind, "You are too mature for all this crazy stuff! " Now I think, may be I was afraid to do it. Come on! every one is afraid of jumping into new things. Think it like jumping into ice cold water. It turns out that only that first step is difficult, the one where you have to jump into it. Once you are in the water, you are not afraid any more. I always stopped myself from having fun (Yeah call me nerd or whatever!) But now when I have had it, I kind of like it. I like getting crazy and wild, taking fun pictures, enjoying the life to its fullest!
And I wonder, still I wonder 
Who'll stop the rain...
So, Abbasi, if you are reading this, just know that you will only have to take the first step. The rest will be all right. Get in the cold water. You will not feel its coldness anymore. Just Jump and don't think :) 
Live Long and prosper!

The One With The Farewell Party

I was watching the last episode of this season and I realized that farewells are really hard and sad. Next thought that hit my mind was ‘Oh you are leaving too! 4 years in a same college and now is the time to say good bye’ For the benefit of readers I should tell that we had already got the official farewell from our juniors. But I came up with a different idea of giving the farewell to ourselves. Surprisingly that idea was taken well and plans were readily made. Initial plan was to go to some nice place on Thursday. Turned out it was a project day for few so we moved the plan to Monday.
On Monday morning we decided to go to Salt n Pepper, Islamabad. Few people had to leave early while I and other three were supposed to come in a Daewoo shuttle. I was busy in dressing (and coloring) Abbasi’s hair in Photoshop while Abbasi and Pashu were forcing me to get ready. I got up reluctantly and got ready. Four of us met near the main gate and we all left to find Daewoo shuttle. To our disappointment, it turned out that they hadn’t enough seats available. Next option was taxi. The moment we asked one cab driver, hundreds of others swarmed towards us, “Baji kidhar jana he” In the rapid confusion and a lot of fuss, we chose one who was offering lower rates and finally set off for the destination.
It was a long route and cab driver had no idea where the restaurant was. We kept wandering Blue area for a long time before we actually found the place. People had already finished their meal (People, as a fair warning I should tell you, food in that place is not good!). So, we ate (reluctantly), took some pictures, paid our shares and then they all left. All of them except me and one of my best friends whom I have lot of fun with. In my whole academic history I have done more adventures with her than with anybody else. We are the ones who went on a secret luncheon together :p we explored new Daewoo bus stop together. Believe me or not, we did scare a hell out of a Rickshaw driver once. There was one time she was supposed to visit my place but instead I ended up visiting her place. I, she and another good friend had a lot of fun (including taking weird PTI-campaign-pictures of each other in public) at F-10 Markaz right after blowing our exam. That was the day when three of us decided to join PTI after graduation.  And many other little stories like that exist. Well this time our adventure was to invade and explore the PIA building. It is a big, fancy, white building located in Blue area. Plan was to enter the building somehow and take photos with pictures of airplanes :p well that was Pashu’s idea. We got passed the security metal detector and security guard with ease. The security lady on the reception area demanded to check our bags. Pashu handed over hers and she asked suspiciously
Iske andar kia he
Pashu gave the lady her innocent smile and said
Kitaben..
The lady smiled. And that’s all. Pashu’s father came to pick us up. The lady was demanding for more bags but we said ‘No need. Hme lene a gain hn’ Awkward moment. We left without saying another word.
May be the farewell party didn't go the way I imagined, but the fun after that was some real fun. And despite of the tininess of this adventure, it was full of joy and source of good memories…

The One in the Sunday Bazaar

So I went to the famous Itwaar Bazaar the other day. It was an experience. Yes, I will refrain from using any adjective here right now. You can choose yourself based on the following observations I made there:
Well, to give a broader picture, Itwaar Bazaar is really crowded place. There are people everywhere, swarms of people. And it is really loud.
"100 rupay ke dhai kilo. 100 rupay ke dhai kilo. Le lo kharboza 100 rupay ke dhai kilo"
Every shopkeeper shouts constantly. And yet I was able to find a similarity between Itwaar Bazaar and stock exchange. Every seller is granted a cabin like, you know, people in stock exchange (in particular and offices in general). Every seller works like a machine, again like people in stock exchange. (Well, not exactly. Shopkeepers at Itwaar Bazaar work much faster). They shout like financial brokers. (minus the temper thing)
The difference is the mahole. One can observe that there are variety of people in Sunday bazzaar. The sellers in cabins, the buyers, the sellers standing on stairs selling mosquito-killer devices.
"Ye le lo. Machar bhag jai ga", the seller boy said
"Han han bhag jai ga", mocked a woman passing by
Few years ago, make it few months, I used to think that our people are not very decent in general. In fact decency left our country long long time ago. Or may be it was never there. Well, a woman in Itwaar bazaar accidentally bumped into my mother and apologized immediately! She kinda took me by surprise. So, our nation is not completely deprived of decency! Good to know.
A counter example from same day same place:
My dad parked the car in an appropriate place. But then, this guy parked his car right behind my dad's so that there was no room for our car to get out. We told the guy to park somewhere else as we were in hurry but he said he won't be long in there. So, when we were done shopping, we came to know the obvious. The guy's car was still there. And yet our car was not the only example. Many cars were trapped by other cars and motorcycles. My dad took a taxi driver's advice. Khan sahab suggested that we should go to the speaker phone and call the guy by his car's number plate. It was a good suggestion, so my dad went in there.
A counter counter example from same day same place:
My dad returned after two minutes with that guy. It turns out that he luckily ran into the guy. The guy said his sorry and moved his car.
I would say that overall experience of Itwaar bazaar was good. Everyone was in rush and meant his/her own business. The bonus point is the left-out decency and morality. Some people still do care...