The real Exam

I screwed my electronics paper. Yes I just screwed it. When I got those horrible marks, I just couldn't collect myself. Instead of consoling, I kept on blaming myself. 'It's all your fault! You knew how to solve that question! What on the earth you were thinking at that time! You stupid prat! You lost 20 marks deliberately, you could do that!', I said to myself. Lying on my bed, staring constantly to roof of the room, with all lights switched off I was regretting on those three hours which I had spent on that electronics paper. Well, words of Harry echoed in my ears 'What is past is past. Every experience has a value'. Yes, that was absolutely right! There was no point of regretting on past. Today, during my evening walk I was thinking about my electronics paper again. And then it came into my mind, how long I was going to regret on my mistakes. I know that as a result my GPA will go down. But how long this tragedy will effect me? Two days? A week? A month? Or if I were a worst kind on nerd, a year? What will happen afterwards? I'll forget it. After ten years I would have forgotten completely that once I had screwed my electronics paper. Then why I am taking too much stress of it on my poor mind! To hell with everything! And then at this moment, I remembered my real exam. The exam which I have to take in this world. Exam of my life. I was screwing this up too. Could I ever imagine what kind of results this can bring to me. What will it mean to me if I get less than 50 percent! Fire forever, pain forever, shame forever. This thought moved my inners. This word 'forever' seemed much powerful than the regretfulness of few weeks. I will forget my mistakes I made in electronics paper after few weeks, my low GPA will effect me for just few years, speaking of very extreme case. But 49 percent in my real exam would lead me to pain for eternity. Why didn't I think of this before? Why did I take my real exam so easy? This indeed is my real fault, a big mistake of mine. May be I can improve my result and GPA in next semester. But I wouldn't get another life to improve my results. I am afraid of that day when I will be shown my soul. But then I think that may be I won't be that afraid of that day. May be I'll become a better person in future and let me hope and pray that when I'll be shown my soul I'll not shut my eyes in horror...